Opening crawl
Hal Brunchkiller has sacrificed his life, getting sucked into the void while defeating the wicked king of Nockmaar Castle.
With his legendary sword in tow, held by Cherlindria’s padawan Fin Rasiel, the battered party, minus Hal, makes their way back to the island to return the wand to the noble sorceress.
The eclipse is due in six months time, and much preparation is necessary for the planned assault on Sifo-Dyas’ stronghold of Tir Asleen.
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| Two Fett clone knights on horseback guarding Tir Asleen Castle |
The party, minus Hal, arrived on the isle. They looked around and saw the same ruins of the temple they saw before.
They sat around and tried to solve a puzzle that wasn’t really a puzzle. They talked and debated how they should proceed now that it appears that the island is deserted.
Fin Rasiel reminded them that they were supposed to deliver the wand to Cherlindria. That’s why they returned to the isle.
The party sat around and debated and discussed how they would find Cherlindria for about 15 minutes.
Rasiel told them that Cherlindria was on this island, like usual.
They sat around some more debating and trying to solve the puzzle that wasn’t a puzzle.
Fin Rasiel reminded them that Cherlindria was likely inside the ruins.
They decided to enter the shrine.
They couldn’t because the door was closed.
One suggested creating a battering ram by hacking down a tree so that they could break the door down.
Another asked Rasiel to cast a spell to open the door.
...
...
...
(The GM lost his patience.)
Rasiel told the party that maybe they should knock on the door like last time.
Turk knocked.
Cherlindria’s head knight, Haloro Danan answered.
Danan: You’ve returned. Please follow me.
The party followed Danan to the inner chamber where Cherlindria and young Bavmorda were seated. Vero and D’wook were also there. Rasiel sat at her usual seat on the other side of Bavmorda.
Cherlindria: I see that Hal is no longer with you.
Danan: So it is time.
Cherlindria began to cry.
Cherlindria (to Danan): I shall miss you.
Danan removed his helmet. He looked like Hal Brunchkiller, but maybe 10 years older than when they last saw him. He knelt in front of Cherlindia who placed her hands on his forehead.
A light began to emanate from her hands. Hal stood up.
CT-12 declared that he had a theory. When Hal got sucked into the void he time traveled to the past.
Cherlindria confirmed this to be the case.
CT-12 thought that it still didn’t makes sense though because the sword and the prophecy were said to have been around before Fishlick, and the town grew around them. And Hal himself only went back 10 years.
Cherlindria said she found Haloro on the island when she fled here and he was in a state of… force induced hibernation.
Haloro explained to her that he had been waiting for her to wake him up and he protected her from all threats. He explained he was from the future and flung far far into the past. Studied the force to learn to hibernate and forged the legendary sword for his past self to wield to get a leg up on the evil king.
Jeegn asked why, with knowledge of the future, he didn’t try to convince Syfo-Dyas when he was still good, to not do evil things.
Cherlindria:… um because that probably didn’t work in a previous timeline… anyway we are at this point meaning that the loop is stable so just go with it.
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| Nevermind that now! |
Hal: Okay I’m back! Let’s go get Syfo-Dyas!
Everyone else: Yeah!!!!
Cherlindria: Well, I don’t know if now is the best time to mount an assault. Syfo-Dyas is very powerful and has an entire army, and besides our plan was to...
Grundle: Wait.. so like.. Can’t you use the wand to revive the stone soldiers?
Jeegn: Oh right. The wand. Here you go!
He gave the wand to Cherlindria.
Cherlindria: Yes... I can do that, but he is more powerful than I am and can probably just change them back. So...
Rasiel: You guys, you already made plans on how to deal with Syfo-Dyas, remember?
Turk: We did?
Everyone else: Blank stare.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZknKIWDA1XU
Rasiel: Don’t you guys remember? You were going to ORDER your clones to do something?
Grundle: Blank stare
Jeegn: Blank stare
Turk: Blank stare
Hal: Blank stare
Just then a red starfleet captain’s uniform materialized onto D’wook, who did a hard facepalm.
Rasiel: So like.. What’s the title of this session?
Hal: Um...
Jeegn: Ur...
Rasiel: So.. like.. Tell me again about how the clones killed all the Jedi?
Hal: Oh yeah. We should call for reinforcements. We’ll wait for the eclipse and then send out a signal and then...
D’wook facepalmed even harder...
Slowly the party pieced together the plan they had put in place the previous session.
Grundle: Cherlindria is going to create a distraction by reviving the stone soldiers. They aren’t the main force that’s going to try to take over Tir Asleen castle because Syfo-Dyas has more clones and will defeat them easily if they try an assault. But when the clones come to engage the army, we’re supposed to sneak into the castle and make our way to where Syfo-Dyas is... tell his bodyguards that order 66 has been called, pretend to kill Hal so that they believe it, then his guards should turn on him. Then we get into the ship and fly away. But wait, how are we going to do that when the eclipse isn’t for another six months?
Rasiel: THIS WAS YOUR PLAN GRUNDLE! DON’T YOU REMEMBER? YOU CAME UP WITH IT! We’re going to wait until the eclipse.
(Editor’s note: This was a bit frustrating for me. I can’t fault the group for not remembering exactly what happened a month ago, but this was a key plot element. Normally Vero is the voice of reason because her player is always locked into what’s going on, but he missed the last session so he didn’t recall what the plan was.)
The party began training and trying to make the best of their situation. They would spend the next six months on this planet, laying low.
Editor’s note: I threw in this six month gap so that it would make sense that they are soon to fight in the Battle of Hoth, which is said to be in 3ABY. Is it odd that for most of the time between Yavin and Hoth the party was in the belly of the Sarlaac for two years and then stranded on a medieval planet for another six months? Well yes. I could have just checked in with the group with an indeterminate amount of time between each mission, and say that time has gone by when it’s time for Hoth... but we have to consider. For example, the Crisis on Cloud City takes place over 3 sessions, but it all happens within a single day. The adventure on this medieval planet took another three sessions, and so far probably about a week or two, mostly because they are traveling on foot to places far away.
So far the party got mixed up with gangsters on Tatooine and were instrumental in the destruction of the Death Star: one week?, depending on how long it takes to travel from Tatooine to Yavin
(two-week gap)
Impersonated imperials rescuing Death Star survivors, then impersonated the imperials being rescued: one day
(one-week gap? Maybe? [depends on how long it takes to get from Yavin to Tatooine, then how long it took for Jabba to sentence them.])
Fed to the sarlaac: one day
(roughly two-year gap )
Boarded a herd ship and found out about the ruins of the palace of Alderaan, then discovered it is a trap for Leia. Discovered the secret of the palace, which was a clone-wars era Trade Federation ship repurposed as an armory: 2-3 days. They spent at least one night on the herd ship.
(2-3 day gap wherein they ran out of fuel)
Stole powercells from some pirates: one day
(two week gap maybe, depending on how long it took them to get reacclimated to living in Echo base and reintegrating into the rebel military.
Stopped Skynet/the Borg from assimilating cloud city: one day
And got stranded on a midieval planet. (so far, about 2-3 weeks, mostly hiking between far flung places).
So you can see up until now they’ve been in control of their characters for about 4-5 weeks and we’ve been playing for over a year, having monthly sessions of five hours each. We have to throw lots of time passing in between sessions whenever possible, otherwise it’s only been a month since the Death Star blew up. ANYWAY...
SIX MONTHS LATER
Spies revealed that the ship was in the courtyard of the castle.
The party devised a plan wherein Cherlindria would awaken the stony soldiers, who are south of Tir Asleen castle. The party would then infiltrate the castle from the north. Go find Syfo-Dyas, do their little acting thing, and then escape.
As they marched north, they were encountered by a roving group of trolls... whom they dispatched of quite handily. They snuck their way into position in the forest behind the castle. They were on a hill and could see the battlefield in front of the castle from their vantage point. They waited, and soon were treated to a display that looked like fireworks coming from the other side of the castle.
Catapult fire began and the drawbridge lowered and clone soldiers... streamed out the front of the castle headed for the battlefield.
The rear of the castle was not heavily guarded so the group decided to strike and eliminate the few guards behind the castle, scale the walls, and then make their way to the courtyard
They moved forward to fight the guards, when from behind them, about 50 fully armored clone troopers with rifles advanced on them.
Turk: Hey we have nothing to fear. These guys can’t see through those helmets and they can’t shoot their blaster rifles anyway because they don’t work on this pl...
BLAM BLAM BLAM!
One of the soldiers shot at the ground in front of Turk’s feet.
Turk: Um... nevermind.
The party noticed that their shadows were fuzzy, like right before an eclipse happens. Come to think of it, it was a bit darker, but not by much. They raised their hands in the air.
Grundle began discussing with the rest of the party about how it might be wise to get captured so that they could be taken directly to Syfo Dyas, which is what they were trying to do in the first place.
Clone: That’s not what’s going to happen. We’re going to take you directly to the dungeon!
D’Wook: Blink...
GM: Okay so there’s a LOT of soldiers here.
D’Wook: Yawns...
GM: It’s almost like escape would be impossible without a miracle.
D’Wook: picks his nose...
GM: Like you’d need a monster-sized miracle to get out of this one...
D’Wook: Oh! Oh yeah!
The little Ewok took out a small horn and blew it loudly, surprising everyone.
With a loud Eagle-like screech, a huge shadow descended upon the group of soldiers, as they all began firing upward in unision... but to no avail.
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| No. Polly don't want no stinkin' cracker! |
The huge flutterplume flew close to the ground, his wings outstretched, knocking half of the soldiers over and promptly ending their lives.
The flutterplume landed, took a huge bite out of several of the others, slapped another five out of the way.
Turk and CT-12 picked up the guns.
Hal ignited his lightsaber.
The rest of the clone troopers tried their best to follow orders to fight to the very end, but now that members of the party had guns and this giant monster, they made short work of the rest of the battalion.
The group hopped on the backs of the flutterplume, with D’Wook piloting. They flew higher and higher until they were at the rampart, looking down into the courtyard below, where they saw hundreds, possibly thousands of soldiers surrounding the Silverlight. Several soldiers were seen loading what appeared to be mounds of kyber crystals into the ship.
The flutterplume landed on the rampart, causing several bricks to fall to the ground.
The soldiers all trained their guns on the massive beast, but Syfo-Dyas raised his arm to signal them not to shoot.
The party dismounted.
Syfo-Dyas: Fools! I outnumber you almost 500 to one! What is it that you hope you can accomplish with this foolhardy mission. In a moment, I shall take your ship and deploy a shield that will allow modern technology to work permanently on this planet and...
Jeegn: Yeah, yeah, we know your plan. But did you know that ORDER 66 has been called?
Syfo-Dyas: Order 66? What’s that?
Grundle: You know, Order 66. The order to kill all the Jedi.
Syfo-Dyas: Ha! No such order exists. Besides, these soldiers are loyal to me and me alone. In fact, you’d need someone ranked higher than me, like a member of the Jedi high council, or possibly the Chancellor. And yeah, we are so far out that even if tech were working we’d have no way of getting any kind of transmission from Coruscant. Guards! Kill them.
CT-16: Wait! Listen to me!
The soldiers looked up curiously at the young Jango Fett clone.
CT-12: It’s true! Order 66 has been called! We must destroy all Jedi!
The clones pointed their weapons at Hal.
Hal: (unconvincingly) What’s going on? Are you guys going to shoot me? Oh no!
Syfo-Dyas looked suspiciously at Hal, who ignited his pink lightsaber.
CT-12 shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
CT-16 shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
Turk shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
CT-12 shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
CT-16 shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
Turk shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
CT-12 shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
CT-16 shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
Turk shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
Vero: (to Hal) Wow, you’re so skilled! These clones will never be able to defeat you! (ERHMMMMM)
CT-12 shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
CT-16 shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
Turk shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
Vero: (unconvincingly) Oh my! It would sure be a shame if you got hit right now, Hal. You might be killed.
CT-12 shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
CT-16 shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
Turk shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
Grundle: (unconvincingly) Oh man. It’s as if your death would prove that Order 66 was legit.
CT-12 shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
CT-16 shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
Turk shot at Hal, who deflected the blaster bolt with his lightsaber.
Gamemaster: Dude... like... do you remember the plan?
Hal: Oh yeah. Right. I forgot..
CT-12 shot at Hal who moved in such a way that it blew a hole in his Jedi cloak.
Hal: Oh no! I’ve been shot! I’m ack.. I’m dying... gosh! I feel cold. Everything is going dark.
With that the clones were convinced. Order 66 had indeed been called and they all turned on Syfo-Dyas, who drew his lightsaber.
Syfo-Dyas: No! I’m your leader and you must be loyal to me! It’s in your programming! I am a Jedi and you must obey my commands!
They began firing on Syfo-Dyas who defelected a few shots and then started to run from the courtyard with fantastic speed over the walls and out of the castle. The clones lowered the draw bridge and rushed out.
Out on the battlefield, the clones that were engaged in battle (armed with medieval weapons, because there are only so many guns and clone trooper armor to go around) were busy fighting the army of soldiers that had once been stone. At one point Cherlindria activated her lightsaber and commanded the clones to stop fighting so everyone was simply standing there when Syfo Dyas arrived. Knowing that these clones were not yet aware that Order 66 had been called, he figured that it was safest next to Cherlindria, who he began battling with his lightsaber.
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| Sure... that's what they looked like. I guess. |
Cherlindria: Your defeat is inevitable, my master.
Syfo-Dyas: But you’re also a Jedi. They’ll turn on you too. We’ve got to work together or else we’re both doomed.
The clones looked very confused, seeing two Jedi fight each other. They knew they have programming requiring them to obey Jedi unquestionably but Jedi fighting each other defies logic.
Cherlindria: Your life will end, and then this planet will be free from your reign of terror.
Syfo-Dyas: But you’ll die too!
Cherlindria: In the grand scheme of things, that matters little.
The moment of totality happened just then, as the lightsabers moved beautifully through the dark, crashing into each other with sparks flying. The unstoned soldiers let out oohs and ahs, whereas the clones began scratching their heads, as the rest of the clones from the courtyard drew ever closer.
Back at the castle, Hal stood up and levitated everyone and himself down to the courtyard. The party ran aboard the ship and took off, knowing that they only had a few seconds before the eclipse was over. Just then, Dr. Blissex ran out into the courtyard from inside the castle, shouting.
Blissex: WAIT FOR ME!!!!!!
D’Wook blew his horn again, and the flutterplume swooped down, grabbed Blissex with his talons, and flew into the open cargo hold of the Silverlight. Blissex’s pants were notably soiled.
(Editor’s note: This didn’t happen in the game. Instead Blissex jumped and the players caught him and pulled him in. But we never resolved how the flutterplume got on board, so this works better.)
The party members thought they should go help Cherlindria by blasting Syfo-Dyas and then rescuing her before the clones caught up with her.
Turk looked out of the cockpit window to see Cherlindria looking at the ship in the air, holding her saber vertically and closing her eyes.
Syfo-Dyas, enraged, struck her with his saber and her body vanished.
(Editor’s note: Jedi vanish when they die. You’ll notice I made Schala Zeal vanish in the belly of the Sarlaac also. This is just how it’s supposed to be. When I watched The Phantom Menace and Qui-Gon Jinn did NOT vanish when he died, I thought that surely George Lucas had made an error. Obi-Wan vanished when he was killed. Yoda vanished when he died of old age. Jedi are supposed to vanish when they die. This nonsense that only Obi-Wan and Yoda vanished because they were so enlightened, because they learned how to be force ghosts from Qui-Gon makes plausible sense, however if they wanted to drive that point home, they should have made Qui-Gon vanish also. There’s just so much about the prequel trilogy that I think should be redone, and this is one of those things. The sequel trilogy at least got it right with both Luke and Leia vanishing upon their deaths... even if I was miffed about how they killed off Luke... but that’s another story. THEY VANISHED! Rant over.)
The party looked very sad that Cherlindria was dead.
Jeegn: It’s okay, Cherlindria’s death does not make Willow as we see it impossible, so let’s just go.
The rest of the clones caught up with Syfo-Dyas and began to shoot at him. The other clones surrounding him saw what was going on and they piled on. He held his own for a while, slashing away at clone after clone and deflecting blaster bolt after blaster bolt, but eventually one of the clones knocked him over and the rest piled on. And he was no more.
By then the Silverlight was long gone.
(Editor’s note: You’re probably wondering what happened next now that the clones had no leader, believe the Jedi are evil and there’s this other army here. And... what could possibly happen between this situation and the film Willow. How did Bavmorda go from being a Jedi Padawan to being an evil sorceress? And what is the relationship between Hal, who was known as Haloro Danan and Elora Danan, the princess who was prophesied to destroy Bavmorda?
Well, I’ll let you leave most of that to your imagination. Bavmorda was probably seduced by the dark side of the force. The clones are known to age rapidly, so they are all probably dead by the time of Willow. But it is very likely that after Syfo-Dyas was killed they then started trying to hunt down Rasiel and Bavmorda, who therefore would have had a hellish adolescence and young adulthood until such time as the clones perished. Considering that Rex, one of the clones from the Clone Wars and Rebels TV shows fought during the battle of Endor and was quite elderly at the time (being around 20-25 years old, but looking around 65-70 due to rapid aging), we can assume that the life expectancy of a clone not counting battle casualties is probably around 30-35 years. Given that some of these clones have been born recently (and many others would be born over the next 9 months) it's conceivable that both padawans are on the run for the next 20 years until clone numbers start growing ever smaller. Who knows? Maybe Bavmorda turned Rasiel into a muskrat so that she could avoid being spotted by clones. Whatever happened, all the clones died by the time of Willow and Bavmorda and Fin Rasiel had a falling out.
But I left a pretty obvious hint by naming Hal’s time traveling alter ego Haloro Danan. He is the progenitor of the Danan line. Also Cherlindria was sad to see him go. I had originally worked it out so that Haloro and Cherlindria had fathered a son who would eventually father Elora with that lady in jail at the beginning of Willow.
With Cherlindria out of the picture though , that means this child is an orphan, and it’s pretty crappy of Cherlindria to not tell Hal about this once she wiped his mind... and pretty crappy of her to sacrifice herself when her son is still a kid. So... well, let’s just say Cherlindria and Haloro were good friends because of their Jedi connection, and well, Hal fathered a son with someone else who hangs out at the shrine and that person will raise their son, Mr. Danan, to adulthood.
Or we could say that Haloro Danan is just such a legendary person in the folklore of the Willow planet that someone else took on his name, thereby absolving Hal completely of being an absentee father.
Shrug, who knows. That’s not important. Our story in the Star Wars galaxy is more important and this detour in this medieval planet (because I wanted to show off the versatility of the d6 system) took far too long. I wanted it to be only a session long, where they crashland, run to the Nelwyns, find Cherlindria, storm Nockmaar castle for the wand, declare order 66 has been called while in the presence of Syfo-Dyas, and they’re on their way back home after one session. Yeah, no, things run very slowly sometimes, and we’ve spent three sessions out here and now it’s almost summer and I wanted the Battle of Hoth to be happening as it was freezing cold outside. It’s now going to be sweltering hot when we finally get to Hoth. But as a small coincidence, the eclipse section of this happened in the same week as the total eclipse in North America on April 8, 2024. It was a total coincidence, but some of my players thought I was genius for lining it up that way. ANYWAY back to the story.)
Blissex urged the party to get a safe distance away from the pulsar so that they could make their way home.
As they get farther and farther away, Blissex notices in the sensor logs that it appears that they were followed here by an old Naboo starfighter, which is highly unlikely since Naboo’s military was dismantled and integrated into the Empire’s at the end of the Clone Wars.
Blissex: The sensors are probably malfunctioning though. After this ship was ransacked on Cloud City, who knows what could have happened.”
The party thought nothing of the weird readings on the sensors.
Blissex: Now that we are at a safe distance from the pulsar, I have some bad news to tell you. We did not arrive here by a normal hyperspace jump. We came through “otherspace,” which until now, has been theorized but never proven. Otherspace is a pocket dimension between realspace and hyperspace and we are not quite sure how it works yet.
We can replicate the conditions that brought us here though... but it will take a team effort.
Turk and Vero should be pilot and copilot to try to dodge asteroids.
The Fett clones should probably man the guns... we may need to blast a few of the smaller asteroids out of the way during the jump process.
Jeegn, it’s probably best if you run the sensor array to try to detect any of the larger asteroids coming up ahead.
Absent working droids, D’Wook, you’ll need to be our emergency repair man. (He handed him a roll of duct tape...) I know technology probably isn’t your strong suit, but you’re short of stature and can crawl to areas no one else can. And you can plug any leaks in the hyperdrive engine.
Hal and Grundle, there will come a time where we need to jettison our cargo of kyber crystals. I know, it’s a waste, but in order to get back home we will need to remove a significant amount of mass at just the right time. So you two wait in the cargo bay for the signal.
I’ll stand near the hyperdrive and manually turn it on and off.
Turk, please head for the following coordinates.
Turk went to the area Blissex requested.
Ahead of the ship was vast asteroid field. Blissex explained that he’s managed to work out that the ship needs to be going in the direction of the asteroids at precisely 888 miles per hour when it reaches a certain point, which is beyond the first few layers of asteroids. He would then order that Grundle and Hal jettison the crystals, while he engages the hyperdrive at just the right moment.
That should be able to trigger otherspace, but any small asteroids that go in with them will need to be shot down, and any of the larger ones will need to be avoided.
Blissex: If my calculations are correct then we should arrive, once again in our own part of the galaxy, though I am not sure exactly where. It is possible we arrive back at the Hoth Asteroid field where we left, but it is also possible we could appear nowhere near there. It’s a matter of shutting off the hyperdrive at the exact right time.
Blissex: Vero, Turk, accelerate!
Jeegn checked the sensors and warned that a huge asteroid was up ahead.
The clones shot away some smaller asteroids. Some of them hit the hull of the ship.
Vero and Turk flew the ship around the large one.
Blissex: Grundle, Hal, release crystals on my mark. 3. 2. 1. NOW!
They pressed the button to open the cargo doors and the crystals fell out into the vacuum of space. The sudden pressure difference blew out the light bulbs.
Just then a hole popped open in front of D’Wook who was down underneath the hyperdrive. He ripped off some tape and stuck it over the hole.
Jeegn checked his sensors and there were two large asteroids up ahead.
Vero and Turk dodged one successfully but scratched the side of the ship against the other.
Two more holes opened up below the hyper drive and D’Wook covered these with his feet as he frantically tried to rip off some more tape, which stuck to his fur. Another small asteroid hit the ship and he dropped the tape. Another hole opened up in front of him and he covered it with his hand.
Jeegn checked the sensors and shouted that it must be malfunctioning again because the Naboo starfighter is showing up again.
Inside the cargo bay, Grundle and Hal pushed the buttons to close the cargo bay doors. It was dark, but Hal sensed there was danger.
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| Massive asteroid just out of frame... |
Another hole opened in front of D’Wook and he used his other arm to cover it. Then another hole opened up. With much cursing, he ripped off the piece of tape stuck to his fur and slammed it over one of the holes and covered the other hole again with his hand.
He called up to Blissex, cursing wildly, saying that he only has so many limbs and he can’t cover any more holes because he dropped the tape.
Blissex does not understand Ewok.
Two more holes appeared, one in front of him and the other behind, So he slammed his face into one and wiggled his butt into the other... with more cursing.
Hal got a very ominous feeling
Meanwhile back in the cockpit...
Blissex: I am engaging the hyperdrive now!
 |
| Fancy flying by Vero and Turk helped them survive this one. |
Everything went haywire outside the cockpit window, as black turned to gray, and then gray to polka dot.
Three very large asteroids and six small asteroids appeared in front of the ship.
The closest asteroid bonked off of the hull, stetting off structural integrity alarms.
Blissex: Course correction in 3...2... 1.... NOW!!!!
As all this was going on, back in the cargo bay:
It was dark, but Hal and Grundle could hear the locks on the exit to the hallway engage.
In the center of the cargo bay a red lightsaber ignited, held by a hooded figure. The hum of the lightsaber sounded bone chilling and the suddenness of its ignition frightened both of them beyond any fear you have ever felt.
The figure removed his hood, revealing the all too familiar Gungan visage, but wait.. No, this was much much scarier. Eerie lenses protruded from where his eyes once were, and his orange Gungan skin was now black shiny metal. His mouth was covered by what looked like a large breathing apparatus. As he walked toward them, his movements appeared far less graceful, but more exact, and robotic.
Hal, was certain that of the three of you, at least one wasn’t going to make it out of this cargo bay alive.
Grundle realized that it was Far Far Stinks, but he had fully succumbed to the evolution droid virus which he contracted on cloud city and alongside the force, it was keeping him alive.
Hal ignited his lightsaber and stood in place yelling “We offered you breakfast burritos!”
Far Far: Breakfast burritos do not concern me young Jedi fool. I want what I came for.
Hal: you sound funny. Why aren’t you talking all meesa and yousa?
Far Far: This… condition has changed me. I am no longer what I used to be. My mind… is no longer just my own. My agony and anguish is constant and I demand vengeance.
Hal stepped forward, bravely holding his ignited lightsaber in front of him.
Hal: come and get it!
Far Far waved his robotic hand and pinned Hal to the wall.
Far Far: No… I am no longer pursuing you Hal. Your chance to join me has come and gone. I want revenge on the man who did this to me…
“GRUNDLE CHANKEN!!!!!”
(Editor's note: Grundle's player looked legitimately scared when I shouted his name. I don't know if it was my sudden raising of my voice, or if I misinterpreted his expressions, but this is kind of one of my proud GM moments.)
“I shall take from you… that which you have taken from me!”
Grundle thought about an Ithorian scream but understood that it would probably be wise not to do this while in such a flimsy ship that’s in faster than hyperspace travel.
Far Far held Grundle down with the force and slice off his right mouth completely… and Grundel shrieked in terror and agony.
“No, death is no good for you. You must suffer!”
Far far turned Grundle upside down and prepared to slice off his left mouth.
“I only wanted to end the war. I needed Hal to bring peace! You ruined my whole plan.. So you shall suffer!”
The collision of a large asteroid caused Far Far to lose concentration and Hal felt that he could control himself again.
Grundle fainted from extreme agony.
After a long and intense fight that went back and forth, with both Hal and Grundle gaining and losing advantages, Hal finally struck the killing blow… bisecting the Gunganator symetrically.
Hal ran to check on his friend… who was still breathing through his other mouth, but barely.
Back in the cockpit
Another large asteroid was is headed directly for the ship and there was no way they were going to avoid it. Vero spotted a cave and suggested heading for there, threading the needle.
Turk protested saying it was not possible to know if the cave went through the asteroid.
Vero said they had no choice, and they headed in, scraping the side of the ship.
Blissex slammed into a wall and was knocked out.
Inside the asteroid they maneuvered around several corners until they came across a dead end.
Jeegn said that sensors picked up that only a few meters of rock separated them from the outside.
The clones fired and they made a hole just big enough to fly through. And they were clear.
Turk and Vero shouted to Blissex that they were through. D’wook shouted that Blissex was sleeping. But nobody spoke Ewok.
Jeegn looked around and saw Blissex lying at the foot of the hyperdrive’s manual controls. He ran over and flipped a switch and brought the ship out of otherspace.
Everyone was rendered unconscious and saw poorly made grayscale computer graphics models of themselves.
The ship was adrift in the middle of an asteroid field. The crew slowly woke up.
Vero: Hoth?
Turk: Maybe.
The control panel began to blink.
Vero: we’re being hailed.
Turk flipped on the coms… Hello?
Coms: unidentified freighter. You are unlawfully entering the territory of New Alderaan. Identify yourself and state your business!
D’Wook climbed out from his hole and took the coms:
D’wook: me tell Cecil me hungry want food!
Coms: what? Who is this?
Turk: um. Tell King Cecil that it’s Turk and I’m
kind of a big deal.
After a few moments….
Coms: you are clear for landing. Proceed to Asteroid 7785.
Roll credits
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