These next two sessions were filler, because this mission aboard the Kuari Princess is supposed to be closing some plot threads in Vero's story, but her player was unable to make both of these sessions. This is how the first one went.
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Wait, isn't that Lion-O from the Thundercats? What is this? (Fear not dear readers. This will make sense... sort of...) |
Session XXII - FOR WHOM THE BELL TOLLS
The half of the Rebel strike team "Delta," led by Hal Brunchkiller, escaped with their lives from the imperial-held world of Aris, abandoning their mission to find the secret Rebel agent known as "Dagger."
Now as stowaways on the Kuari Princess cruise ship, they encountered the other half of Delta Team, who after their own (more successful) investigation, have determined that Dagger is likely someone on board.
Since Dagger has vital information about a meeting between Imperial Moffs Gideon and Wolf, finding him among the throngs of hedonistic passengers before the cruiseliner's final destination is the team's highest priority...
So the two halves met up together and Vero (as the NPC I was controlling) suggested they go to their rooms to get some privacy. That way they could plan how they were going to search for Dagger.
The players started talking about the lambda shuttle that they saw in the hangar, and passers by caught wind of it. Some in the group noticed that people were pointing at them and whispering to each other.
Vero suggested that they split up so as to not draw attention to themselves, so she left for the turbolift alone.
Several of the others split up and took separate turbolifts, but Hal, Grundle, and Golden Wheels for some reason continued to talk about suspicious things and continued to draw attention to themselves. They talked very loudly about going to the casino to cheat at gambling. My memory gets a bit fuzzy but eventually Hal was confronted by security and he attempted to use the Jedi mind trick to get past them... not realizing that he didn't know that power.
(Note: I really like Hal's player, I really do... but he honestly thought he had this power despite us never having talked about it and him having never learned it before. He's had a lot of trouble understanding how the force works, so I made him out a cheat sheet for each of his force powers, what he needs to roll, and what the effect is.
When he was still having trouble I houseruled some powers to make them easier.
But now he's trying to use powers he doesn't have. I found it to be frustrating... but thematically this has come to simply be who Hal is. He's much less Jedi Master and much more the Quixotic Jedi template. Anywho...)
Alright so I am not sure exactly how this happened, but security ended up handcuffing Hal and were going to take him in for questioning, but he kept resisting. One of the security guards hit him in the shins, forcing him to his knees...
Hal: Harder please. Hit me harder.
Hal feigned a weird type of aroused euphoria, and the guards were taken aback by it. I think it was here that Maki then retrieved her flamethrower from L1-NK and set fire to a trashcan, and they both disappeared into the shadows. Suddenly one security guard left to go put out the fire. The other one stood Hal up and was leading him to the turbolift. Once inside, Hal used the force to knock him into the wall. It was just then that a human male and a Twi'lek female entered the turbolift mid-makeout. They were too busy smooching to even notice Hal, who managed to liberate the security guard of the key to his handcuffs and take them off. He gave the cuffs to the human and got off at the next floor.
Eventually he met Goldenwheels and Grundle inside the casino. They tried to get some chips, but found out that their credits were no good. Instead the ship uses a crypto currency called griftcoin. They asked where they can buy griftcoin with credits. The cashier told them they should have taken care of that before getting on the ship. Additionally, during the next few port calls, they would not be in an area that accepts credits. So if they didn't have any griftcoin, they'd have no money at all.
Meanwhile, Vero and the others began setting up a base of operations in their rooms. They were able to open the doors between the rooms to make it one large area.
Grundle, Golden Wheels, and Hal returned to the rooms and explained their situation about griftcoin. The idea was floated that some of them would need to find employment, while others would need to search for dagger. Just then..
Intercom: Attention all passengers.. This is the captain speaking... We are experiencing a problem with our life-support systems. There is no imminent danger at this time, but we’ll have to make an unscheduled stop on the planet Doom for emergency repairs. During the emergency stop, passengers will be free to roam about the spaceport but may not leave. Repeat. Passengers MAY NOT LEAVE THE SPACEPORT!!!!! Do not search the spaceport for secret exits! Do not attempt to find a sidequest outside of the spaceport. That is all.
The ship flew over a very dark looking world.
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It's like all city... with industrial fumes. Pretty evil! |
Passengers from the Kuari Princess funneled out of the ship and several of them were complaining about the inconvenience. Other passengers exclaimed that they thought it would be a good time to go shopping.
The concourse was not at all crowded, and various abandoned shops and restaurants that hadn’t been in use for many years lined the walls. Signs in some of them gave prices for food in Republic credits.
In the center of the concourse was a towering portrait of King Zarkon, the ruler of Planet Doom.
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What a handsome guy! |
There were hundreds of gates, but aside from the Princess, there was only one other ship, docked at the port. It was a black personnel transport with a huge banner that said GWF on the side.
Several of the players (with successful knowledge rolls) recalled that the GWF was the Galactic Wrestling Federation.
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Meh, close enough. |
As they were walking through the concourse, Hal bent down to tie his shoe and lost his balance. This caused him to bump into Turk, who bumped into a person in front of him... a very large Trandoshan. He was with three other Trandoshans. They were wearing multicolored headbands. Red, Blue, Purple and Orange.
Michaelangelo: Hey watch it wiseguy...
Raphael: Yo, who does this moron think he is?
Turk: I'm Turk, and I'm kind of a big deal.
Leonardo: Hey wait a minute... Don’t we know these guys from somewhere?
Donatello: Yeah.. we ran into them on Starbase 1337, didn’t we?
Raphael: Oh yeah, that’s right... And wouldn’t you know it.. There’s Turk. Man we have a score to settle with you!!!!
Raphael reared back ready to punch Turk in the face. Mikey got into a fighting stance.
Hal asked L1-NK to retrieve his lightsaber, and L1 passed it to him.
Hal: Give us all your griftcoin... or else!
Turk: We don't really need to fight... let's talk this out.
Leonardo: Guys.. guys.. That’s not the job we’re on. Raphael.. You have that big fight tonight anyway. Save your energy for that. If we want to get paid you have to get a pop out of the crowd, remember? We still have three more shows until we pay off all the debt on the Turtle Van repairs and Master Splinter’s medical bills.
Raphael stared down Turk....
Raphael: You’re lucky... if I didn’t have a fight today you’d be dead meat!
Suddenly Leonardo’s comlink went off. “Hey Leo, it’s Mince. Tonight’s show is canceled... the other transport has been attacked by pirates and they’re holding all the other wrestlers hostage.”
Leo: But Mince.. We need to get paid! If we don’t fork over the credits, Splinter can’t have that operation. How can you cancel just two hours before the show?
Mince: Look, this is just business. I’m sorry but there’s nothing I can do... unless you know of 10 other fighters who can take their place, we’re gonna have to cancel.
Leo: Well can we have an advance on the next show then?
Mince: No can do. But I’ll see you when we get there.
Leo: Roger that....Ughh.. that Mince VcMahon... he’s got no sympathy for the people...
Raphel: All right.. Come on Turk let’s end this!
Raphael lunges at Turk... but once again Leo gets in the way ... blocking him. Save it!... You have a fight tonight Raphael.
Raph: But Mince said the show was canceled.
Leo: No.. he said the show was cancelled unless we can find 10 other fighters... And look what we have before us...
Turk, Goldenwheels, Vero, D'Wook, LosarTan, Hal, Grundle, L1-NK, Soan, and Maki figured out what was going on and agreed to fight.
Leo got Mince back on the line and Soan began negotiating their contract. Mince said he'd give 1500 griftcoin to winners and 750 to losers. Soan explained that since the show depends on their participation, and because Mince would earn many times what they were paying the talent, the nine members of Delta Team needed double. Mince counteroffered 2000 for winners, 1000 for losers. Soan accepted.
They mingled in with a bunch of other wrestlers and snuck aboard a transport that would take them to the grand arena. It was a packed house.
(Note: I do not remember what exactly happened in each match, so some of these I'm making up. Sorry to players if I got it wrong, but I wrote out the announcer's dialogue and read it in my best Howard Finkel impression)
Match 1
Announcer: The following contest is set for one fall... and it is a HELL IN THE CELL MATCH
Music: The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles theme
Introducing first and weighing in at 235 pounds he hails from the Coruscant city sewers. He’s the cool but rude member of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Trandoshans… Ra Fa Ellllll!
(applause)
Music: Weird Al Yancovic: Dare to be stupid!
Announcer: And his opponent, hailing from parts unknown, weighing in at 175 pounds… the sharpshooting smuggler with a (airquote) quick (airquote) wit… he’s kind of a big deal…. TUUUUUUUUUURK!
(silence... people began asking "Who")
This was a pretty straightforward match. Turk was getting his butt kicked by Raphael but then suddenly he pointed off in the distance and asked Raphael what that thing over there was. Raphael fell for it and then Turk closelined him and hit him with an elbow from the top rope.
The ref counted to 3 and Turk was the winner.
Match 2
Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for ONE fall.....and it is a flamethrower ladder match!
Music: Pokemon theme
Introducing first ... weighing in at 105 pounds and hailing from Pallet Town. He wants to be the very best that no one ever was. He’s gotta catch ‘em all. The pokemon trainer that remains 10 years old after 25 years... Ash... Ketchum!!!!!!!!
(applause)
Music: Jimi Hendrix - Fire
Announcer: And his opponent ....
Weighing in at 92 pounds. From Endor ... A master of the flamethrower and princess of her tribe Wokka wokka... it’s Maki Femeeeeeeeeeek!
(oooh)
By this point, Maki's player had left for the day. This would have been a fun match to play out. I had planned to have Ash throw in Pikachu only. and I am sure Maki would have gotten her licks in and the two of them would have knocked the ladder off several times as they climb to grab hold of the flamethrower and set their opponent on fire. But she wasn't there, so what could have been lots of fun did not occur.
Because she was not present, Ash and Pikachu won.
Match 3
(Note: originally I was going to have Vero fight against the Baroness from G.I. Joe. But I switched it up because I wanted to play the Baroness' music more than Sailor Moon's. Vero was a no show afterall)
Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall...and it is a submission only match
Music: Sailor Moon theme (Japanese)
Announcer: Introducing first... weighing in at 112 pounds.... The school girl that causes grown men living in their parents’ basements to buy lifesize pillows with her visage printed on them..... From Japan.... She is the one called Sailor Mooooooooon!
Music: the heroic theme from Aliens
Announcer: And her opponent... weighing in at 115 pounds, and hailing from the Tangenine sector ... often mistaken for Princess Leia Organa, because she’s usually the only woman around, and yet she talks and acts like one of the guys (note, her player is male). She is a graduate of the Imperial academy... She flies ships, she hacks computers, and she leads a team of commandos that are totally not affiliated with the Rebel Alliance...
Vero Moreeeeeloooooock.
Though her player would take issue with Sailor Moon beating her in a submission-only match, since he was not there, that's exactly what happened. Sailor Moon did hit Vero with a little moon tiara action first though... so it was kind of cheating.
Match 4
Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and is a three hits match.
Music: Styx - Mr. Roboto
Announcer: Introducing first... weighing in at a staggering 430 pounds... Hailing from the astromech factory on planet Nubia, He is the occasional deus ex machina that’s actually a machine... Supplier of Chocolate bars and knuckle sandwiches... L1-NK
Music: the Super Mario Bros theme
Announcer: And his opponent... weighing in at 290 pounds, from Brooklyn New York via the Mushroom Kingdom. He is one half of the legendary Mario Brothers. Mario..... Mario!!!!!!!!!!
During this fight, Mario came out shooting fireballs to no effect on L1-NK. L1 punched him, causing him to change color from white and red to red and blue.
From then kept trying to jump off the ropes to get some height and land on top of L1-NK, which he did successfully twice.
The third time, which would have sealed the deal for Mario, L1-NK opened his top and sucked Mario into his insides.
(Note: Since his encounter with Ahsoka, L1-NK has become a "droid of holding," meaning he has almost infinite capacity as long as something can physically fit inside the circumference of his body.)
As Mario was being sucked in he said in his high pitched voice, "Oh... nooooo."
The game over music from Super Mario Bros could be heard.
Match 5
Announcer: The following contest is set for one fall and is for the Robot Wars Championship....
(Note: recall that GW is the Robot Wars Champion from back in session 14)
Music: Transformers G1 Season 3 theme
Announcer: Introducing first ... weighing in at approximately 1,600 pounds. Hailing from Iacon on the planet Cybertron... He’s every Autobot’s little brother and Spike Witwicky’s best friend... Bumblebeeeeeeee!
Music: Robocop theme
Announcer: And his opponent, cobbled together from spare droidparts in a tiny shop on the planet Tattooine.. He has escaped prison with the power of his own poop...(sorta) He is the robot wars Champion ... GOLDEN WHEELS!!!!
This one went back and forth, but eventually Bumblebee transformed into a VW bug and ran over GW. He tried to kick out but rolled poorly, thereby losing. Bumblebee took the Robot Wars championship.
Match 6
Announcer: The next contest is for the Galactic Wrestling Federation Cruiserweight championship
Music: AC/DC - Thunderstruck
Announcer: Introducing first... the challenger... hailing from the planet Endor and weighing in at 110 pounds. He’s taken out a heavily armored security droid with a stone-tipped wooden spear... a lover of chocolate bars and shiny rocks.... The Dwarf Wookie who once tasted a whole barrel of spice several years ago and who is STILL feeling the effects... the master without a blaster .... D’Wooooooook!!!!
Music: Lord of the Rings Theme
Announcer: And his opponent... from the Shire ... and weighing in at 120 pounds... He’s been known to hang out in musty caves petting a ring all day... He is the GWF cruiserweight champion... Smeagol.. The Gollummm!
In this one each side got a few good shots in. Gollum got down on all fours and contorted every which way to dodge D'Wook's punches until finally D'Wook connected, causing Golum to reel back. With an angry face, Golum put on the ring and became invisible.
Several undetectable punches connected on D'Wook but then he started to smell where Gollum was and was able to anticipate where he would be. He grabbed his hand and bit his ring finger off. Gollum was reeling in pain, as D'Wook put the ring on himself. From there, Gollum had blow after blow rain down upon him, and he contorted as D'Wook's hits were not detectable. As Gollum was knocked out, D'Wook took off the ring and appeared with one foot lying on Gollum's chest. The ref counted to 3 and D'Wook raised his hands in the air victorious. He dropped the ring onto Gollum's battered body, grabbed his belt, got some applause from the crowd and marched back behind the curtains.
Match 7
(Note: Soan was originally supposed to fight Sailor Moon, but I did a last minute switcheroo. This was too bad because her player isn't old enough to remember '80s G.I. Joe. But that's okay)
Announcer: The following contest is for the Galactic Wrestling Federation Women’s Championship
Music: the Wonder Woman movie theme
Announcer: Introducing first, the challenger.... Weighing in at 129 pounds ... the master of parkour and an expert negotiator for contraband items. From Ryloth..... Soan Vooooooooan!!!!
Music: the Cobra theme from G.I. Joe the Movie
Announcer: And her opponent, weighing in at 117 pounds, representing Cobra - a ruthless terrorist organization determined to rule the galaxy. She made pre-pubescent boys in the 1980s question whether maybe girls weren’t so icky afterall... THE BARONNESSSSSSSS!
The Baroness entered sitting in the open hatch of a H.I.S.S. tank.
This match had a lot of parkour and flips from Soan and a lot of dodging out of the way from The Baroness. Eventually the Baroness pulled out a knife from her boot and began stabbing at Soan. Soan called for L1, who was mysterously still at ringside. She asked for her katana. L1 opened the hatch and Mario jumped out.
Mario: Mamma-mia, it's-a cold in there!
L1 threw the katana to Soan who knocked away the Baroness' knife. She tossed the katana back to L1, did a few flips and kicks, and put her in the Pedigree.
Turk: We don't really need to fight... let's talk this out.
Leonardo: Guys.. guys.. That’s not the job we’re on. Raphael.. You have that big fight tonight anyway. Save your energy for that. If we want to get paid you have to get a pop out of the crowd, remember? We still have three more shows until we pay off all the debt on the Turtle Van repairs and Master Splinter’s medical bills.
Raphael stared down Turk....
Raphael: You’re lucky... if I didn’t have a fight today you’d be dead meat!
Suddenly Leonardo’s comlink went off. “Hey Leo, it’s Mince. Tonight’s show is canceled... the other transport has been attacked by pirates and they’re holding all the other wrestlers hostage.”
Leo: But Mince.. We need to get paid! If we don’t fork over the credits, Splinter can’t have that operation. How can you cancel just two hours before the show?
Mince: Look, this is just business. I’m sorry but there’s nothing I can do... unless you know of 10 other fighters who can take their place, we’re gonna have to cancel.
Leo: Well can we have an advance on the next show then?
Mince: No can do. But I’ll see you when we get there.
Leo: Roger that....Ughh.. that Mince VcMahon... he’s got no sympathy for the people...
Raphel: All right.. Come on Turk let’s end this!
Raphael lunges at Turk... but once again Leo gets in the way ... blocking him. Save it!... You have a fight tonight Raphael.
Raph: But Mince said the show was canceled.
Leo: No.. he said the show was cancelled unless we can find 10 other fighters... And look what we have before us...
Turk, Goldenwheels, Vero, D'Wook, LosarTan, Hal, Grundle, L1-NK, Soan, and Maki figured out what was going on and agreed to fight.
Leo got Mince back on the line and Soan began negotiating their contract. Mince said he'd give 1500 griftcoin to winners and 750 to losers. Soan explained that since the show depends on their participation, and because Mince would earn many times what they were paying the talent, the nine members of Delta Team needed double. Mince counteroffered 2000 for winners, 1000 for losers. Soan accepted.
They mingled in with a bunch of other wrestlers and snuck aboard a transport that would take them to the grand arena. It was a packed house.
(Note: I do not remember what exactly happened in each match, so some of these I'm making up. Sorry to players if I got it wrong, but I wrote out the announcer's dialogue and read it in my best Howard Finkel impression)
Match 1
Announcer: The following contest is set for one fall... and it is a HELL IN THE CELL MATCH
Music: The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles theme
Introducing first and weighing in at 235 pounds he hails from the Coruscant city sewers. He’s the cool but rude member of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Trandoshans… Ra Fa Ellllll!
(applause)
Music: Weird Al Yancovic: Dare to be stupid!
Announcer: And his opponent, hailing from parts unknown, weighing in at 175 pounds… the sharpshooting smuggler with a (airquote) quick (airquote) wit… he’s kind of a big deal…. TUUUUUUUUUURK!
(silence... people began asking "Who")
This was a pretty straightforward match. Turk was getting his butt kicked by Raphael but then suddenly he pointed off in the distance and asked Raphael what that thing over there was. Raphael fell for it and then Turk closelined him and hit him with an elbow from the top rope.
The ref counted to 3 and Turk was the winner.
Match 2
Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for ONE fall.....and it is a flamethrower ladder match!
Music: Pokemon theme
Introducing first ... weighing in at 105 pounds and hailing from Pallet Town. He wants to be the very best that no one ever was. He’s gotta catch ‘em all. The pokemon trainer that remains 10 years old after 25 years... Ash... Ketchum!!!!!!!!
(applause)
Music: Jimi Hendrix - Fire
Announcer: And his opponent ....
Weighing in at 92 pounds. From Endor ... A master of the flamethrower and princess of her tribe Wokka wokka... it’s Maki Femeeeeeeeeeek!
(oooh)
By this point, Maki's player had left for the day. This would have been a fun match to play out. I had planned to have Ash throw in Pikachu only. and I am sure Maki would have gotten her licks in and the two of them would have knocked the ladder off several times as they climb to grab hold of the flamethrower and set their opponent on fire. But she wasn't there, so what could have been lots of fun did not occur.
Because she was not present, Ash and Pikachu won.
Match 3
(Note: originally I was going to have Vero fight against the Baroness from G.I. Joe. But I switched it up because I wanted to play the Baroness' music more than Sailor Moon's. Vero was a no show afterall)
Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall...and it is a submission only match
Music: Sailor Moon theme (Japanese)
Announcer: Introducing first... weighing in at 112 pounds.... The school girl that causes grown men living in their parents’ basements to buy lifesize pillows with her visage printed on them..... From Japan.... She is the one called Sailor Mooooooooon!
Music: the heroic theme from Aliens
Announcer: And her opponent... weighing in at 115 pounds, and hailing from the Tangenine sector ... often mistaken for Princess Leia Organa, because she’s usually the only woman around, and yet she talks and acts like one of the guys (note, her player is male). She is a graduate of the Imperial academy... She flies ships, she hacks computers, and she leads a team of commandos that are totally not affiliated with the Rebel Alliance...
Vero Moreeeeeloooooock.
Though her player would take issue with Sailor Moon beating her in a submission-only match, since he was not there, that's exactly what happened. Sailor Moon did hit Vero with a little moon tiara action first though... so it was kind of cheating.
Match 4
Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and is a three hits match.
Music: Styx - Mr. Roboto
Announcer: Introducing first... weighing in at a staggering 430 pounds... Hailing from the astromech factory on planet Nubia, He is the occasional deus ex machina that’s actually a machine... Supplier of Chocolate bars and knuckle sandwiches... L1-NK
Music: the Super Mario Bros theme
Announcer: And his opponent... weighing in at 290 pounds, from Brooklyn New York via the Mushroom Kingdom. He is one half of the legendary Mario Brothers. Mario..... Mario!!!!!!!!!!
During this fight, Mario came out shooting fireballs to no effect on L1-NK. L1 punched him, causing him to change color from white and red to red and blue.
From then kept trying to jump off the ropes to get some height and land on top of L1-NK, which he did successfully twice.
The third time, which would have sealed the deal for Mario, L1-NK opened his top and sucked Mario into his insides.
(Note: Since his encounter with Ahsoka, L1-NK has become a "droid of holding," meaning he has almost infinite capacity as long as something can physically fit inside the circumference of his body.)
As Mario was being sucked in he said in his high pitched voice, "Oh... nooooo."
The game over music from Super Mario Bros could be heard.
Match 5
Announcer: The following contest is set for one fall and is for the Robot Wars Championship....
(Note: recall that GW is the Robot Wars Champion from back in session 14)
Music: Transformers G1 Season 3 theme
Announcer: Introducing first ... weighing in at approximately 1,600 pounds. Hailing from Iacon on the planet Cybertron... He’s every Autobot’s little brother and Spike Witwicky’s best friend... Bumblebeeeeeeee!
Music: Robocop theme
Announcer: And his opponent, cobbled together from spare droidparts in a tiny shop on the planet Tattooine.. He has escaped prison with the power of his own poop...(sorta) He is the robot wars Champion ... GOLDEN WHEELS!!!!
This one went back and forth, but eventually Bumblebee transformed into a VW bug and ran over GW. He tried to kick out but rolled poorly, thereby losing. Bumblebee took the Robot Wars championship.
Match 6
Announcer: The next contest is for the Galactic Wrestling Federation Cruiserweight championship
Music: AC/DC - Thunderstruck
Announcer: Introducing first... the challenger... hailing from the planet Endor and weighing in at 110 pounds. He’s taken out a heavily armored security droid with a stone-tipped wooden spear... a lover of chocolate bars and shiny rocks.... The Dwarf Wookie who once tasted a whole barrel of spice several years ago and who is STILL feeling the effects... the master without a blaster .... D’Wooooooook!!!!
Music: Lord of the Rings Theme
Announcer: And his opponent... from the Shire ... and weighing in at 120 pounds... He’s been known to hang out in musty caves petting a ring all day... He is the GWF cruiserweight champion... Smeagol.. The Gollummm!
In this one each side got a few good shots in. Gollum got down on all fours and contorted every which way to dodge D'Wook's punches until finally D'Wook connected, causing Golum to reel back. With an angry face, Golum put on the ring and became invisible.
Several undetectable punches connected on D'Wook but then he started to smell where Gollum was and was able to anticipate where he would be. He grabbed his hand and bit his ring finger off. Gollum was reeling in pain, as D'Wook put the ring on himself. From there, Gollum had blow after blow rain down upon him, and he contorted as D'Wook's hits were not detectable. As Gollum was knocked out, D'Wook took off the ring and appeared with one foot lying on Gollum's chest. The ref counted to 3 and D'Wook raised his hands in the air victorious. He dropped the ring onto Gollum's battered body, grabbed his belt, got some applause from the crowd and marched back behind the curtains.
Match 7
(Note: Soan was originally supposed to fight Sailor Moon, but I did a last minute switcheroo. This was too bad because her player isn't old enough to remember '80s G.I. Joe. But that's okay)
Announcer: The following contest is for the Galactic Wrestling Federation Women’s Championship
Music: the Wonder Woman movie theme
Announcer: Introducing first, the challenger.... Weighing in at 129 pounds ... the master of parkour and an expert negotiator for contraband items. From Ryloth..... Soan Vooooooooan!!!!
Music: the Cobra theme from G.I. Joe the Movie
Announcer: And her opponent, weighing in at 117 pounds, representing Cobra - a ruthless terrorist organization determined to rule the galaxy. She made pre-pubescent boys in the 1980s question whether maybe girls weren’t so icky afterall... THE BARONNESSSSSSSS!
The Baroness entered sitting in the open hatch of a H.I.S.S. tank.
This match had a lot of parkour and flips from Soan and a lot of dodging out of the way from The Baroness. Eventually the Baroness pulled out a knife from her boot and began stabbing at Soan. Soan called for L1, who was mysterously still at ringside. She asked for her katana. L1 opened the hatch and Mario jumped out.
Mario: Mamma-mia, it's-a cold in there!
L1 threw the katana to Soan who knocked away the Baroness' knife. She tossed the katana back to L1, did a few flips and kicks, and put her in the Pedigree.
(Note, the Pedigree is a wrestling move made famous by Triple H. It involves sitting on someone's head and smashing their face into the mat. Here, I'll show you...)
Soan pinned the Baroness to claim the championship.
Match 8
Announcer: The following contest is for the Galactic Wrestling Federation Tag Team Championship!!!
Introducing first... the challengers....
Music: Morris Day and the Time - Jungle Love
Now making his way to the ring, weighing in at 245 pounds and hailing from Ithor. He is the galaxy’s most talented harmonica player, and the most popular member of the Ice Pirates other than Jeegn Ztungles. His screams have been known to break down walls. GRUNDLEEEEE... CHANKEN!!!!!!
Music: (a specific theme that was played in Return of the Jedi)
Announcer: And his partner..... Weighing 98 pounds and not a weakling. He is a believer in the force who thinks the Jedi will one day return (crowd erupts in laughter). Hal Brunchkiller!!!!!!!
Music: Thundercats theme
And their opponents... weighing in at a combined 370 pounds, hailing from Third Earth. They are the GWF Tag Team Champions!!! Feel the Magic, Hear the Roar... Lion-O and Panthro... the THUNDERCATS!!!!!!!
(Note: this is the match that really made the whole session. The amount of laughter that came from everyone really made this the best match of the night. It was great all around)
It started off with Grundle vs Panthro and well, Grundle was really no match. He got beaten up a bit but during one of the times he was being thrown to the turnbuckle, he was lucky enough to reach his hand out and tag Hal, who was able to repel Pantro backward using the force. Lion-O tagged in and began tossing Hal around and he was about to be pinned.
That's when Grundle came in and kicked Lion-O off of Hal. The referee then began telling Grundle to get back in his corner... but while he was distracted, Hal went for a low blow.. and Lion-O fell to the ground in pain.
Panthro objected to the ref, complaining that Hal had just hit his partner in his snarfs. The ref turned around and saw Lion-O in pain, and started yelling at Hal to back away. Hal raised his hands up in the air as the ref got in his face. Grundle entered the ring and stomped on Lion-O's Wileykit and Wileykat.
Panthro stepped back in and started arguing with the ref some more. That's when Grundle picked up Lion-O and ran him into the ropes. He lifted Lion-O up into the air and Hal, using the force, leapt high into the air and grabbed him by the back of the neck mid-air and they landed on the mat in a thunderous boom.
Match 8
Announcer: The following contest is for the Galactic Wrestling Federation Tag Team Championship!!!
Introducing first... the challengers....
Music: Morris Day and the Time - Jungle Love
Now making his way to the ring, weighing in at 245 pounds and hailing from Ithor. He is the galaxy’s most talented harmonica player, and the most popular member of the Ice Pirates other than Jeegn Ztungles. His screams have been known to break down walls. GRUNDLEEEEE... CHANKEN!!!!!!
Music: (a specific theme that was played in Return of the Jedi)
Announcer: And his partner..... Weighing 98 pounds and not a weakling. He is a believer in the force who thinks the Jedi will one day return (crowd erupts in laughter). Hal Brunchkiller!!!!!!!
Music: Thundercats theme
And their opponents... weighing in at a combined 370 pounds, hailing from Third Earth. They are the GWF Tag Team Champions!!! Feel the Magic, Hear the Roar... Lion-O and Panthro... the THUNDERCATS!!!!!!!
(Note: this is the match that really made the whole session. The amount of laughter that came from everyone really made this the best match of the night. It was great all around)
It started off with Grundle vs Panthro and well, Grundle was really no match. He got beaten up a bit but during one of the times he was being thrown to the turnbuckle, he was lucky enough to reach his hand out and tag Hal, who was able to repel Pantro backward using the force. Lion-O tagged in and began tossing Hal around and he was about to be pinned.
That's when Grundle came in and kicked Lion-O off of Hal. The referee then began telling Grundle to get back in his corner... but while he was distracted, Hal went for a low blow.. and Lion-O fell to the ground in pain.
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Oww! |
Panthro objected to the ref, complaining that Hal had just hit his partner in his snarfs. The ref turned around and saw Lion-O in pain, and started yelling at Hal to back away. Hal raised his hands up in the air as the ref got in his face. Grundle entered the ring and stomped on Lion-O's Wileykit and Wileykat.
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Jeez! |
Panthro stepped back in and started arguing with the ref some more. That's when Grundle picked up Lion-O and ran him into the ropes. He lifted Lion-O up into the air and Hal, using the force, leapt high into the air and grabbed him by the back of the neck mid-air and they landed on the mat in a thunderous boom.
It looked like this:
Grundle got up and ran full speed into Panthro and they both tumbled out of the ring.
Hal went for the pin and the referee counted 1.2.3!!!!
The announcer came into the ring and the microphone was lowered from the rafters.... but it came loose and fell onto Lion-O, who was laying prone. Guess where?
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Sword of OMENS! |
(Note: this caused the whole table to erupt in laughter. It was totally spontaneous. You can plan for a lot of things as GM, but sometimes quick thinking to entertain the players happens organically. I am proud of myself for this one.)
Match 9
Announcer: The following MAIN EVENT match is for the Galactic Wrestling Federation Heavyweight Championship
Music: Iron Chef theme
Announcer: Introducing first, the challenger... weighing in at 254 pounds. He’s apparently an accomplished chef and former bounty hunter. From Mandalore... Losar’Tan!!!!!
Losar's player put a lot of thought into his entrance. Some security guards knocked on his dressing room and he walked out among them as they escorted him to the arena entrance. As he emerged from behind the curtain, there was a lot of pyro as he stood motionless. When the pyro was finished, he breathed smoke out of his bounty hunter mask and began punching the air very violently as more pyro went off in sync with his every move. The crowd chanted Loooosar Looooosar....
(Okay, it was Goldberg's entrance, but I like that he really got into the spirit.)
Here's what it looks like:
Music: He-Man theme
Announcer:And his opponent... weighing in at 244 pounds from Eternia.... Fabulous secret powers were revealed to him the day he held up his magic sword and said “By the power of Greyskull ... I have the power!!!!!!” He is the GWF Heavyweight champion and a Master of the Universe ... He-Man!!!!!!!
Prince Adam came into the ring and raised his sword into the air and said the words. He transformed into He-Man before everyone's eyes. He threw the sword outside the ring
(Note: The last match was tough to follow, and I don't really remember much about this match. But LoSar certainly had the best entrance)
From what I remember, they sparred back and forth doing more and more powermoves on each other. Eventually, Battlecat came and threw He-Man his sword. L1-NK threw LoSar his frypan, and he used it to block a slash from the sword, then whacked He-Man in the head while the ref was arguing with Battlecat.
He stood He-Man up, hit him with a spear and went for the pin.
As his music played, LoSar'Tan raised the championship belt high in the air, as J.R. yelled into the microphone what a slobberknocker this match was. The event was a massive success as the crowd began to chant his name.
LOOOOSAAAAAR
LOOOOSAAAAAR!!!!
😃